time comes and goes. i just looked through a photo album of a friend of my brothers, who was celebrating his last year at the air force academy.

i remember when my friends at the academies were getting ready to be sophomores, and I was looking forward to my junior year in college.

it all seems to have just wizzed by, and here i am - 24, out on my own, never to have a college experience again. this bums me out in a lot of ways, and i guess right now, that bumming out is outweighing the positive forethought of what lies ahead of me. truly the best is yet to come, but i just have no idea how quickly the past 6 years went, and i have no idea how much i would learn, and grow and change and gain perspective since i started the next steps in my life.



nostalgia is a funny thing - truly i think its a form of pity party - and thats not the best way to go about living life. but it is a good thing sometimes b/c you get to look back, and i think that for those who are mature enough to get over it (the nostalgia that is) in an appropriate amount of time, it forces you to evaluate where you are now, and where you are headed.... and who you are.


... and does that picture look like you want it to? are you who you want to be? truly, are you just letting the situations play the major role in molding you, or are you using situations to mold yourself, with the guidance of Wisdom, and the Wisest of Councils?


but i guess most of it is, for me anyway, i miss the way i used to think about developing - about how i told myself - thats not the best thing to do in the situation, and "this type of person doesn't notice when you do this" or things like that.


wow i don't blog very 'organizationally'


also, i wonder if the people who helped me along the way, realize what the have done, and i wonder if they value it.

i know that i value the thought of potentially doing that for someone else, and it would be great to know and hear that i did.




... and man people's journeys are just so unique, and unexpected. some can't hang on, some can.

but all of us need to hold out hope.


truly, hope.