really i can't believe that its been over 2 weeks since i posted last. times are flying by; this semester is almost over. my friend elisabeth started a blog. holla. ejexplains.blogspot.com

sometimes i wonder if i should pursue a career in sports. i spend enough time talking and thinking about it.

it could be the weather; however i think that a lot of ****s are st****** their *****ds within this past week or this coming week.


YIKES!

i think sometimes i've undervalued myself.

i think that i should change a little of this attitude.

especially remembering what i learned in Europe

i wonder if you read this. if you do, i hope you can understand how to be flexible, and understand that its ok to change sometimes. i hope you'll stop being scared and start to do things to challenge yourself.






band of horses is a new group that miori told me about that, like he said, I'm fairly certain i will be a big fan of for a long, long time.

thanks j-sal

i can't believe how quickly time flies. people say that often; but its incredibly true. quickly: late AUGUST turns into EARLY NOVEMBER, and the fall nears an end. what did i do with my time? i feel like i've been oddly constructive, and oddly lazy. i can't tell how i feel about these past few weeks. time will tell.

jenny

I am continually amazed at how the Lord truly takes care of our hearts when we ask Him to. When we just do it half-heartedly and out of repetition and pattern, it is very hard to hear sincerity in your petition. But when we find ourselves at a point where we know we shouldn't be or we know we need help, sincerity seems to flow easier.

"guys i don't expect you to understand this; but i can relate to Monica Lewinski"
-e (rifle, shotgunn, .44magnum)

"a woman needs a man, like a fish needs a bicycle"
-u2

its noble, wanting to go on a mission. sometimes i realize its an obedience to the Lord. but sometimes, i think people miss the big picture when they just think about 1 aspect of missions, or Christianity.


i just spent an incredible few days with an incredible girl.


i'm still looking for a long-term and short-term job


i don't ever want to be boring.


boring; brutal; bummer; barely; blessings; break-out

You're dangerous 'cause you're honest
You're dangerous, you don't know what you want

if you're afraid to ask hard questions, then shut the hell up.

i have a suspicion that there is maybe 6 or 7 people that read this every 2 weeks or so.

quick thoughts on facebook: there are some people who don't need to be on facebook. from day 1 - i was worried that facebook would be come creepy and public like myspace. i think facebook also is a cop-out to communication in some ways - and in other ways its very convenient and easy to use. but there are some people that don't need to be on facebook. like myspace, its just an invitation to creeps and perverts who can now register and join, and look at groups and stalk college and high school students. its another way for people to be impersonal and live behind a screen. i use facebook because it has some great features, but when it comes to keeping up with people in my life that i truly care about, i'll get a hold of them in person or by phone at the least.

also, there is not a need for some other people to be on facebook. i'm going mainly at adults here. the adults in my graduate school classes (Al, the HPD officer, Noe the CSPD investigator, Griffin the married guy, among many others) aren't on it. and sure - i understand that some adults who interact with students regularly might have some purpose for it; but then again - isn't there an area of life where students need some autonomy? i'm not here to tell anyone what to do and what not to do - i'm just confused by some people's actions. honestly there comes a point where people need to let go. this is applicable not only to a parent, but also to a freshly ended relationship, etc. and stalkbook makes it a little harder to let go; sometimes. there are lots of great benefits to the internet and free flow of information, but stalking and nosiness are byproducts that i'm not a huge fan of. no one is i think.

sometimes i think people test me. and sometimes i wish they would. i would like to hear - at the end of some frustrating situation i'm involved in - someone goes: "dan, we [or i] were just kidding about that. i just wanted to see what you would do, and how you would handle that".

i wish people knew how much i care about them. what i wouldn't do to make sure they are enjoying life and being happy. then i think to myself - maybe some people are - and me not being in their life is the best thing for a while. as much as it is a blow to my pride, i need to learn to accept this, and be consistent in my saying "whatever i can do (or not do) to help". i just wish someone could point out when i should or shouldn't be there. because sometimes i feel like a complete jackass, overly annoying, and a hinderer to their enjoyment. sometimes i feel like this on the basketball court. i'm not good at hoops. i'm maybe a 5.2 on a 1-10 scale, and when i wanna go play - usually with people who are way better than me - i feel like a tag along. so i do my best to contribute, and not take dumb shots, or look too stupid.

i just wish everyone could feel comfortable in talking with me. especially the people i care about - because at the end of the day - they take priority.

i think this is more of the 5-th year funk i'm experiencing - with fewer friends in town, fewer people to go hang out with and do things with. here's the honest truth: i love it. i'm so glad that my hand is forced to stay at home, and be responsible, look for a job, and get my shit together. because, as i found out this weekend - there is always time for a good time. i know people say that you should maximize your time in college - and i feel like i have - i have a lot of fun stories (which some might consider lame), and i've had a hell of a time, but there is something in me that is ready for the next challenge. believe me - now that i'm back from the summer - i'm glad i have another year in college station, and there are only a few things that i would trade for it (extensive travel - with my family perhaps - and "the perfect job" - of which there are very few) but i'm so glad i get to spend another year near my brother, close to my folks, and with the few remaining people in college station that i wanna hang out with.

in the mean time, i'll do my best to understand my role in different situations, and try and focus on what i need to do. but more than what I need to do; i wanna be available to drop anything i'm doing to help or hang out with those i love. and i want to learn what i don't know about them. this is my greatest challenge - and God has been helping me with it very slowly, but surely - to shut the hell up and listen. to not talk and be a sounding board. my time will come to give advice or give my opinion - but for the rest of my life, i want to make sure that is secondary to opening my ears, and opening my eyes. I ask for your help, anyone who might read this, in showing me, and talking to me about how i can do this better.


Do you not know?
Have you not heard?
The LORD is the everlasting God,
the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary,
and his understanding no one can fathom.

He gives strength to the weary
and increases the power of the weak.

Even youths grow tired and weary,
and young men stumble and fall;

but those who hope in the LORD
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint.

isaiah 40:28-31

i have a few problems with how you interact with people. it makes me question the idea of being engaged before you are 22. i don't think people have experienced enough to fully go through with an engagement and marriage when they are still desiring things that a mature, married family-person would not.

this post, though scantly read, will make sense to very few.

lots of smiles. very pleasant. and other side +'s

how is it that women are so good? it really blows me away sometimes - their knack for observation and memory, etc. its sick. it really is.

this weekend was very fun. travis bearden got married in Tyler, and a bunch of our good friends were all able to get together and have a blast. robbie gentry is a new friend of mine and i'm so glad we got a chance to hang out. i'm excited about chillin with him next year. he and i really seem to have a connection on a different level than most.

really i'm so lucky to have traveled a lot of places. one thing i realized in dc was how happy i will be when i don't have to take my family on a tour bus waiting in line with all the other chump tourists. i've become pretty familiar with the major tourist cities - and i love it. i know that if you put me anywhere close to dc or in any borough in new york city, i can get to any other place. i think.

but all this to say i'm very glad that i have been able to learn my way around major cities in the world.

After 4 days in new york I have a lot of thoughts. The people I got to see and hang out with are awesome. Even if it was only for a short while – and what can you expect now when people have graduated from college or are doing professional work. Either way it was amazing. I must say, on a side note, that I accomplished one of my private, non-listed aims this week as well.

Virginia, a new friend, is an amazing girl; and she has a list of things she wants to accomplish in her life. Some of the things are small, and some are big. But that got me to thinking about my personal list. Over the last few years I definitely have thought of some things that I would want to do before I die. I don’t suppose I’ll list them right now on here, but I might in the future. One thing that I realized this week after talking with one of my best friends, is that people really do look out for number 1. No matter how much they might say that they are not selfish – they really are pretty selfish. Now – with that being said – there are a few people in my life that really hit close to a completely selfless attitude. Derek devine is one of them. If you hang around Derek, he will hardly talk about himself, and even if you ask him, he is so great at bringing the conversation elsewhere. If you have friends like Derek – you should listen and learn from them more – I know I do.

I find myself in a weird situation with my life-timing right now. I’ve finished 4 years of college and for all intensive purposes I should be on the job hunt/working. But I have 1 more year in grad school. So I get to delay it for another year and get a masters. I’m gonna be honest – the program I’m in hasn’t been as hard has I expected - now I’m pretty sure that this next year is going to kick my arse but that's ok because now I’m ready for it – it was tough last year trying to balance my senior year with the first year of grad school – I still had a big social pull – and I know I’ll always have that pull but it was especially hard this past year – and even harder with more time on my hands*

Last time I wrote some letters I got blasted for being arrogant. Maybe my disclaimers didn’t work but, for what it is worth – I think the idea of writing letters on my blog is not arrogant, it might be a little cowardly –since I am not saying this to these peoples’ faces. But I’m pretty sure at least 1 or 2 hit their targets. So I guess it was successful. Like i said to people who know me – at the heart of things – in the big picture perspective – I don’t care a lot about what people think of me. In the small picture, I’ll have to be honest, sometimes I do care what people think. I need to work on that. Man I can’t wait to meet my wife. I wrote In my journal a while back about who I thought it might be – and although it is still a possibility, it is not one right now. And truthfully – if it is not her, then I’m ok with whoever the Lord throws in my way. Wow I can’t wait to love her with everything I have.

jimmy and kelly needham amaze me. they do. their sincerity and their love is unbelievable. one of the things that exemplifies this the most is the fact that kelly got her degree in 3 years - from the business school.

this i'm sure is random, but they are an encouragement to me. seriously.